Nowhere is this more true than remarketing. For any company that intends to last, remarketing revenue is where the gold is mined. Sure acquisition gets the glamour and big budget but it all comes at a loss and it’s only after the second, third or sometimes even later stage purchases that the ink starts to darken up into a nice shade of black. But despite the value, and our proclamations about being transparent, modern, “connected” companies, most of us still send the same offers… if not the same exact creative… to win customers back that went out in 1996.

Enticing as they may be to bring people back, the real chance to grow [and I mean really grow] comes when you know why they left first.

I’m not talking about sampling or cluster surveying. That’s all wonderful information and research you should do to know where your audience lies as a whole, it says nothing to the average customer to show them that you have even the slightest real interest in them beyond their money. And that’s a problem.

By asking each customer you gain two very valuable opportunities. First you give them a reason to respond… the promise of being heard without the thread of being sold too… and that’s enough to restart a connection. Second, and more obvious, you find out what drove them away, and potentially even what might bring them back.

Think about it… If you’re a cable company that sends a letter a week, you may discover that customer Frank doesn’t want TV and instead target him with high speed web, which they he uses for streaming movies daily. If you’re a gym, you could uncover that Sally is 7 months pregnant and taking a break giving you the chance to offer her a new-mother class with child watching upsell. If you’re a CPG you may learn that your product is being made to last longer, that generics are entering the market in offsetting cycles or one of a million of another insights that doesn’t reflect everyone, but is essential to that one prospect ever returning.

1:1 segmentation will never be the easiest or cheapest but then again, building return business isn’t simple or cheap. But thanks to the “social world”, what was once seen as prying is now the consumer’s expectation… People are willing to talk for nothing, heck, social channels show they talk even without being asked. So start asking them and let them tell you how to earn them back – rebuild their trust — or when to move away and save your funds for a warmer prospect.

First I found out that it’s time for me to propose thanks To Robbins Brothers.

Then I found out this special someone works in an office thanks to ProFlowers.

This was news to me but all seemed slightly ok until Victoria’s Secret told me there was a new way for me to love my own body in time for Valentine’s Day, with a bra. I guess only women end up on their mailing list.

Tiffany’s also shot over a confusing one when they offered to help me get a gift for “him” although they were ambiguous about who exactly “he” was.

And of course we can’t forget the anniversary gifts, computer parts and other suggestions sent out by all my other favorite retailers, most of which had much less impactful insights into my world.

Now I’m not suggesting any of these companies should have held back on their campaigns, in fact I’d like to I commend them on trying a diverse set of campaign messages and using some great creative to drive the sale. And these campaigns aren’t much different from what we see on TV, hear about in radio spots and are bombarded with in every other channel possible. What’s different is the opportunity of the internet – with a little interaction, some micro-profiling or even just a fun email offer Robbins Brothers could know my relationship status, Pro Flowers could be sure the name they keep suggesting a gift for is still a part of my life and Victoria’s Secret could become aware of my gender.

Personalization isn’t only about stopping awkward emails; it’s also a conversion steroid. Just think about it – if 1-800-Flowers knew who my mom was (they’ve shipped to her), what the status of my current relationship is, and that I’m more of the random flowers type than the once a year guy they could have slaughtered all their competition with some targeted and really useful gift suggestions instead of 23 different offers over 14 days. Getting accurate consumer data is of course a fine line as you don’t want to scare people off but as the world becomes increasingly digital the opportunity for a little profiling exists, it just needs to be used.

20 of the emails I got from 1800Flowers in just 2 weeks. The shocker: This isn't everything.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to update my family on some recent insights.